This is the Day!

Hi blog family!

It has been a while but life, is always happening, even when were busy! lol

Have you ever had a great idea but did not act on it?

Ask yourself why?
Did you need a contact name, money, materials?
 Why did you not act on it when the idea was fresh?
Often we can sabotage ourselves by NOT acting on an idea!

We are all creative and have the ability to create a million dollar idea....but not many of us act on it. When I say us, yes, those who grew up in any home and were NOT encourage to follow through on an idea.
I say we all have a 6th sense" when you know something is right or wrong...

many of us are taught to suppress this feeling very young and when we get older....the concept...."no faith" in our ideas has taken place....it has become embedded, thanks to family, no family, negative people, places and things...everything teaches you NOT to follow your instinct...especially if you were in a group home, (not knowing you likely have a better "instinct" than anyone)...because you had to use it to stay away from bad people!!....

Not many kids in group home settings are encouraged to try new things and not be afraid to be different...example:" if i said in a group home: "I'm gonna be a superstar in TV one day" ....most kids and other would laugh or say "Yea right"!!

But Eddie Murphy, Mariah Carey, Pit Bull, Kerry Washington, DMX, Oprah....(OK Oprah was not a Foster kid but she had some comparisons....)
think of this:
MANY survivors of Holocaust/Slavery/famine/AIDS epidemic etc... were orphaned and many in parts of Africa...8 million are today!!!

 It was DMC from Run DMC that said at an event we spoke at years ago...."Jesus" was an orphan!!!

 Its not what you are or where your at!!....its where are you going and what are you doing to get there!!
Everyone has divine purpose, yours may not be the same as mine! That is why you must follow through with YOUR talent, gifts and ideas!!!!
You may save or change a life one day!" (that is my quote from my   brother Rob that passed.....)

the names above were said to have been in foster care at some point in their lives....they all  knew they would make it one day...because they followed an inner voice...instinct"!!! They are not perfect" but they have all contributed to the world through film, singing acting and activism- you can't beat that for a foster kid!!!
WE ALL HAVE IT!!!! God made us ALL special, some just choose to Not be anything GREAT- we choose mediocre....or "OK"...You chose that, you were not born 'OK" you were born to be great! Something happened along the way to divert you - its OK...get back on your path of greatness!!!! TODAY!!!

We may "think" of a great idea....but it will be just a thought......
You cannot get to your dream without taking chances!! Think of a million dollar idea, Paint the next Picasso, invent a new product, write the next manuscript...
Get Out meet people in the field you WANT to be in!!
Join groups on Linkdin/FB/YOUTUBE and other sites that give you advice on the talent, skill or idea you are trying to develop!
Remember failure is not an option!!
When you don't act on something......nothing will come of that great idea!
Paint that picture you always dreamed of..
write that script you have in your head for a blockbuster movie!
Meet new friends that share your interest, take a class at the local college if you need to...
invent something new you think the world needs.

Don't let not having materials, money or even connections stop you! There is always some action you could take: write it down, find a mentor, use alternative to make a prototype, (until you get what you need)
Whatever you have been dreaming to do, to make to be.....start today, this is the day created just for you!!
Smile, someone is watching you....:)

Tanya

Gettting finances in order

Hi blog family!

It has been a while - but I'm always "here"...even when I don't post, I am checking in to see if anyone ask questions....the event was a success, our lovely Mayor gave us another proclamation!! What a surprise! I saw people that were touched by our speaker, Pat from Family Ties!! A few left wanting to foster older kids!!! What more could you ask for! Our 4 winners, know that our community has their backs and we support their hard work!! Special thanks to Ramuso who let us know why scholarships, no matter how small, helps!! Thanks to our kind donors who helped all 4 kids..ALL MONEY WENT TO KIDS...fliers, food, copies, FREE! God always sends us angels when we need them and we are working on 501c3 but the faithful still helped us. We proved you can help others....with your talent and without a dime!! Big thanks to ALL my brother Robert's friends...it would not be possible without you and Megan for starting the ball rolling...."We do what we can, when we can, with the gifts God gave us-teaching other foster kids to reach, teach and pay it forward!!"- Tanya/Megan/Rob

I was talking to my friend, who was also a foster child all his life, and he said something important: "I hope to get my finances in order, so that I can live without stressing money".  I also talked to another friend and then thought about my own situations: when I've had money , (as a model years ago), and when I did not an now....
It is tough to be laid off from full-time perm work with benefits...I fell victim but I survive, my foster mom use to say it is better to have $5 than not have any $!! And she is right! You can build off of SOMETHING....you cannot plan or make moves with 0....
My advice:
1. find any job or jobs that will pay you atleast minimum wage..(if you could waitress, its better, cash tipes will allow you to pay off debtors, student loans etc...)
2. If you can, work odd jobs, making jewelry, art/...selling at fairs/events
3. It is better to write down your plan of financial success, don't leave it to memory....:( mines is bad!!)lol
4. Stay confident that you will find a job! Dont give in or up!!
5. If you have NO skills....look for scholorships to take one class (filmaking, jewelry, writing)..whatever field you WANT to be in...NY film school, Jacob Burns Film Center, Communiity college, library, and job force in your area, sometimes you don't need a degree but knowledge of a skill...example...editing final cut pro...you don't need a degree, in fact most of you that love computers...could  take this one time class and become great editors of video's or movies!!!! Yes, its that easy...
6. ALWAYS ask about a scholorship...if you make less than $25,000 single or $30,000 with a kid...you usually qualify!! Yes, its a pain to get "references" but hey, you said YOU WANT to the universe??? then do your part!!
Nothing in this life comes easy BUT i promise you its a great world with lots to see and people to meet that can bring you to your next level of greatness!! God is good and working miracles in your life ALL the time you are alive!!!
Don't be discouraged if you are slower than most, you just have to find YOUR calling!!!! Life is wonderful but you need a financial plan
1. Save $1 for every $10 you make!! You must pay yourself 1st...
2. have one account for bills, one for emergency and one for "family stuff or your stuff' if single/no kids
3. write how much money you NEED to live comfortable and don't settle for "just making it"..BUT if that's all you can do...then enjoy it!!
You don't need to be on the wheel of life OR keep up with the Jones IF you know you have reached YOUR FULL potential of what God gave you!!! 
Always find ways to live better, make more income to be comfortable, never chase a $..that is why you should have 2 jobs if your  with no kids!!! when one check mess up, you have the other, never stressing over a bill...trust me I know all too well and that is why i share, so you DON'T make the mistakes I made!!!
Remember God loves YOU MOST!!! Your  Divine and powerful when you have faith, love and try to be all God wants you to be!!! xo

Tanya

Matter of Fact Monday 05/14 by tlbethel | Blog Talk Radio

Matter of Fact Monday 05/14 by tlbethel | Blog Talk Radio
Me interviewing with Tommy!! May is National foster care awareness month..come out Friday at the Mount Kisco Public Library 2nd fl 2-4 pm We will be raising awareness and I will share my story!!

Matter of Fact Monday 05/14 by tlbethel | Blog Talk Radio

Matter of Fact Monday 05/14 by tlbethel | Blog Talk Radio Tanya on Radio!! see you Friday May 18th in Mount Kisco Public Library!! 2-4pm

Happy Mothers Day!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO YOU ALL - DO BETTER THAN YOUR MOTHERS, MOTHERS, MOTHERS BY UPLIFTING AND ADVANCING THE NEXT GENERATION!
IF YOUR KIDS CAN'T DO BETTER THAN YOU, WHY DID WE HAVE THEM? EDUCATE YOUR KIDS, LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONAL, NEVER CHECK OUT ON THEM BY TURNING TO DRUGS, CHECK IN ON THEM WITH LOVE, COMPASSION AND PRAYER, AND HOPE FOR A BETTER, BRIGHTER FUTURE!! XO

TANYA

some out an celebrate National Foster care awareness month with Fosterkidsunite!! RSVP....if you know any youth aging out and going to college email me for an application for our Robert Cooper Memorial stipend!!
Fosterkidsunite tries to address issues raised AFTER foster care, an unforgotten community. Please come celebrate if your in NY, show your love for those that help and are being honored!

Have a great day, "smile, you may save or change a life" - Tanya

Taking action when the odds seem low!

Hi blog family!

* Reminder* May is National Foster Care Awareness month - Fosterkidsunite will be having our Robert Cooper memorial scholorship award ceremony at the Mount Kisco Library May 18th 2-4 2nd fl conference room!
( RSVP) You don't want to miss it, this is a time we find those aging out and off to school and award them with a stipend for their hard work and their future journey in life without major family support! If you know anyone in NY that is ageing out and could use money for books, transportation or toward tuition, please send me their email and I will forward an application!

Hope you are all enjoying the lovely weather by getting OUTSIDE, walking, biking, enjoying this lovely earth!

I know as a former foster child that at times when you are trying to keep your head above water; (work two jobs, smile- even when your not happy, be kind, feel family love, (when their is no mom to give a hug), just basic life skills of "making it" one day at a time - can be a challenge!
Why?
 If you grew up in group homes all of your life OR lived in foster homes who had parents that were more like gatekeepers than caregivers...lol..(some of you know what I am saying)... all of these can make it a daily struggle.
What I want you to do: 
1. always remain hopeful - ("we never give up!) :)
2. Focus on what you DO have and CAN do: (good friends, good mate, job, the fact that YOU are breathing, (and not on life support - if your reading this), the fact that YOU are here, (we all know with our former parents who were addicts, WE COULD HAVE DIED before we got to care; via abuse, neglect or your mom could of said let me not have this baby!!! I know its harsh but - don't ever forget that YOU are Alive!!
We often fall into pity parties" and forget that we are living - that means everything!! it means a new start every day you wake!
It means you can forgive (OR be forgiven) for the crazy mistake you made yesterday!!!
It means you can start over!! Do you know what that means in a world without parents??? Start over is everything!
When you age out (or those that did), don't be sad, be happy that now you can live your life how YOU see fit!
But it takes hard work!
Effort,
resistance and....
persistence!!
You Have to always be ready to take action - even when the odds are low! (w
You and I were born to beat the odds, in fact, as long as you are alive, breathing and with sound mind, chances/odds is our biggest weapon in the fight for a good, quality life after foster care!!!
Get excited every time you wake in the morning - even if its raining, even if you woke up to negative energy---only you can control how you "feel" - their is NO excuse for staying down- as a former foster child i am constantly falling.....and getting back up! There is nothing wrong with you if you experience sad feeling occasionally! There is nothing wrong" if you feel lonely-- even in a room full of people!
There is nothing wrong" with having the odds" "appearing" against you- remember you grew up in foster care NOTHING can shake you!
 How many people could survive AND be happy after losing parents at a young age or being separated from your sibling?
As human beings, we are more resilient than we think! Think of what you ancestors went through and still made it our alive AND produced many more generations!!!!

You are a winner - always know this, in fact- never allow anyone at anytime to tell you otherwise!
We must stay strong when the odds seem low--especially after foster care by: educating yourself, traveling the world when you can, helping others (it teaches humility), meditating/quiet time to listen what the universe or God is telling you!

You have a heart, follow it, nurture it, even if that means finding GOOD things to fill the void of not having family or a loving" mom/parent... find good friends/mates, love others more by giving your time to the needy....trust me it takes the spotlight off of "YOUR" problem! (remember everyone hurts sometime!!!!
Life is wonderful, full of surprises - don't give up at the first sign of trouble!
 
Dont forget, when the odds are against you:
Raise your head high and strut down the runway of life...all eyes on the winner-YOU!!!!

Have a great day and remember to smile, someone is watching you!!! You may save or change a life!! xo Tanya

keeping your eye on the prize

Hi blog family!
Thank you ALL who have visited this site!! We are growing, which means the word is getting out, a blog foster and ex foster kids can go to ....please ask any questions, I will find an answer if i don't have one!!

alot going on...including the usual life drama...always to be continued! lol...

Fosterkidsunite, what is the point of this blog? Why do we give stipends to kids aging out of foster care?
Because this is what I was called to do!!!
 I am blogging in response to a "naysayer", (they have no idea they was negative but I am sharing so that you learn a lesson on sticking to your guns!! ( thoughts, ideas, plans....not an actual gun...lol (i don't like those things and they kill people so please know i am NOT talking about a weapon! lol... follow me...

Today I am Keeping my eye on the prize...why am I hear, what is my purpose?? TO HELP OTHER FOSTER KIDS!!! I am clear about this.
I realized I don't have to be a celebrity or have money, I have to have heart, will and take action....and I am doing the later!
Recently I went to ask someone in great authority/position to help me, they basically said my ideas were great, ( I didn't need them to tell me that..i needed their model for success on helping others..), but they said: "no one would take me serious or give money without the 501c3 yet!"

At that point I lost all of my respect for this person because I thought they were a visionary" a leader" but I realize....they are just another clone in society who feels that only "known" people or those with "Money" can make a difference.

I thought to myself, if money could solve problems vs ideas, a few good people and action, then why is Africa still starving?
why is Katrina victims still displaced,
why are people still homeless,.. because we have, "money" in place to help them???

 I hope you get my point--money is needed, is great BUT without the PERSON to volunteer or take time, money means nothing!!

I want to see change, one kid at a time!
 It may  seem slow but at least I will see the results and NOT a statistic!! I want to know how that "kid" that aged out is doing in 15 years..after he left...no what 350,000 kids on paper are "doing"!!!! follow me....
We as people need to get up get out and do something for a cause we believe in, nothing will change until WE do!! Stats mean NOTHING unless YOU SEE and know results, you can only know if you follow through adulthood, everything else....is a guess...

As you may know May is National Foster Care Awareness month--deemed by our president as a time to raise awareness, in your way, in your community about the issues of foster care!

This will be our 2nd event at the Mount Kisco Public Library May 18th 2-4 2nd floor conference room. 
Please RSVP!! (the room only holds 100!)  and last year, it was filled!!

We will be honoring people working with foster kids and a few young people aging out and going to school will be awarded a stipend to help them through the first semester!
We hope each winner will not care about the money but the fact that someone is thinking of them, following them through school and teaching them they must PAY IT FORWARD!!
We can only help each other by sharing what we know, then passing it on.
There are times when you will be tested on how much you believe in you or your ideas and faith...I say... keep your eye on the prize...aging out gracefully and with a future plan--even if its not exactly what you envisioned, its a plan!
I was told the other day after sharing that i was doing this event and will make NO money, (all food, items for event are donated) but i was still asked by a person: "why are you doing it if your not getting anything out of it"?  I was stunned but I know that MOST people are not awake and everyone wants to keep up with the Jones" - but not only was I not raised like that by my foster mother but I take on this work because SOMEBODY has too!!
And who better than I who lived through foster care? Life still is not perfect, (it never will be or I would be in "heaven" lol..) I know that 30,000 kids leaving a year and around 9,000 in care in my area....I can only help a few...but I'M OK with that!!
Don't allow negative or money hungry people into your head to make you think that your wrong for not wanting money for doing something you love!
We are still working on the 501c3 but that will not deter me from helping 4 kids a year, only health or death could stop me now.
 I know what a difference ONE person can make in the life of a foster kid who has NO FAMILY- I would NOT have made it through NYU without the help of a lovely lady, (R.I.P Mrs. Bauer)! So the point for today is to stay focused on what is right for YOU, stay true to what YOU believe, even if its not aligned with others, as long as its right, ethical, and will help you to help others...

life is short, when I leave there is only one song I could hear in my head: "If I can help somebody, as I travel along, then my living will not be in vain".. (writer unknown)... this is my favorite gospel hymn and my fav song since i came into foster care. I try not to let naysayers effect me, but i am human. Please know that I care about every foster child and I will do what i can, with what little I have to assure a few " get it" before they leave care! This is my mission with Fosterkidsunite, I hope your in!

Have a great day, smile, someone is watching you - you may make their day!! xo Tanya

May 18th celebration reminder

Hi blog family!
Reminder - May 18th 2-4 at the Mount Kisco Library Fosterkidsunite will be having our annual "Robert Cooper Memorial Scholorship award ceremony!!  Please RSVP if you plan to attend! We will also be honoring two great people from Westchester who do alot of work with group home kids!! I will also be sharing information on fostering and how to help our kids in care!!

Have a great day ...smile, someone is watching you....xo Tanya

Words from Tony Robbins on Own...

Hi blog family!
I like to give credit when do AND if someone else can say something to save or change your life........I let them speak and share what they say!
Tony Robbins is a brilliant man who gets "how to live and enjoy life".... I got this from Oprah's own, (forgive me O) lol... but good stuff must be shared!!! enjoy!!

The life coach and host of Breakthrough with Tony Robbins believes in living a passionate life, a life in which fear is a counselor, not a jailer. Here, he shows us how to "step up" during our most intimidating moments:

1. Don't Turn an Excuse into an Identity
We need be careful of how we label ourselves, for example, saying "I'm an fearful person" or "I'm a weak person" or "I'm not a strong person." Usually that label comes from your current or past behavior, but once the label becomes a part of you, it starts to control you. So what I try to get people to understand is: Hey, you're not broken. You don't need to be fixed. You don't need a label. All you need to do is say, "I have to decide how I want to be now going forward."

2. Develop a Habit 
Courage is not the absence of fear. That idea is the biggest b.s. in the world. Fear is impossible to eradicate. If you were completely fearless, you'd be dead. People who are courageous are scared to the core—they just make themselves go forward anyway; they make themselves take some kind of action. Taking action, even though you're afraid, is how you become courageous—because courage, like fear, is a habit. The more you do it, the more you do it, and this habit—of stepping up, of taking action—more than anything else, will move you in a different direction.

3. Let Your Body Lead the Way 
Taking that action for the first time can be pretty rough. When it comes time to give the speech to the committee or snowboard down the mountain, don't hesitate. Don't start to analyze it. The longer you stand there, the harder it gets, because then your mind gets involved. If your challenge is mental, use your body. If it's in the body, use your body more aggressively. At 17 years old, I was on my own, sleeping in a laundry room. I had no idea what to do. I was so depressed. Fear is physically debilitating. I had to defeat it. So I made myself run until I thought I was going to spit up blood. I got stronger in my body, which, in turn gave me mental strength. 

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Tony-Robbins-How-to-Live-Courageously#ixzz1qqF2l66z