some out an celebrate National Foster care awareness month with Fosterkidsunite!! RSVP....if you know any youth aging out and going to college email me for an application for our Robert Cooper Memorial stipend!!
Fosterkidsunite tries to address issues raised AFTER foster care, an unforgotten community. Please come celebrate if your in NY, show your love for those that help and are being honored!

Have a great day, "smile, you may save or change a life" - Tanya

Taking action when the odds seem low!

Hi blog family!

* Reminder* May is National Foster Care Awareness month - Fosterkidsunite will be having our Robert Cooper memorial scholorship award ceremony at the Mount Kisco Library May 18th 2-4 2nd fl conference room!
( RSVP) You don't want to miss it, this is a time we find those aging out and off to school and award them with a stipend for their hard work and their future journey in life without major family support! If you know anyone in NY that is ageing out and could use money for books, transportation or toward tuition, please send me their email and I will forward an application!

Hope you are all enjoying the lovely weather by getting OUTSIDE, walking, biking, enjoying this lovely earth!

I know as a former foster child that at times when you are trying to keep your head above water; (work two jobs, smile- even when your not happy, be kind, feel family love, (when their is no mom to give a hug), just basic life skills of "making it" one day at a time - can be a challenge!
Why?
 If you grew up in group homes all of your life OR lived in foster homes who had parents that were more like gatekeepers than caregivers...lol..(some of you know what I am saying)... all of these can make it a daily struggle.
What I want you to do: 
1. always remain hopeful - ("we never give up!) :)
2. Focus on what you DO have and CAN do: (good friends, good mate, job, the fact that YOU are breathing, (and not on life support - if your reading this), the fact that YOU are here, (we all know with our former parents who were addicts, WE COULD HAVE DIED before we got to care; via abuse, neglect or your mom could of said let me not have this baby!!! I know its harsh but - don't ever forget that YOU are Alive!!
We often fall into pity parties" and forget that we are living - that means everything!! it means a new start every day you wake!
It means you can forgive (OR be forgiven) for the crazy mistake you made yesterday!!!
It means you can start over!! Do you know what that means in a world without parents??? Start over is everything!
When you age out (or those that did), don't be sad, be happy that now you can live your life how YOU see fit!
But it takes hard work!
Effort,
resistance and....
persistence!!
You Have to always be ready to take action - even when the odds are low! (w
You and I were born to beat the odds, in fact, as long as you are alive, breathing and with sound mind, chances/odds is our biggest weapon in the fight for a good, quality life after foster care!!!
Get excited every time you wake in the morning - even if its raining, even if you woke up to negative energy---only you can control how you "feel" - their is NO excuse for staying down- as a former foster child i am constantly falling.....and getting back up! There is nothing wrong with you if you experience sad feeling occasionally! There is nothing wrong" if you feel lonely-- even in a room full of people!
There is nothing wrong" with having the odds" "appearing" against you- remember you grew up in foster care NOTHING can shake you!
 How many people could survive AND be happy after losing parents at a young age or being separated from your sibling?
As human beings, we are more resilient than we think! Think of what you ancestors went through and still made it our alive AND produced many more generations!!!!

You are a winner - always know this, in fact- never allow anyone at anytime to tell you otherwise!
We must stay strong when the odds seem low--especially after foster care by: educating yourself, traveling the world when you can, helping others (it teaches humility), meditating/quiet time to listen what the universe or God is telling you!

You have a heart, follow it, nurture it, even if that means finding GOOD things to fill the void of not having family or a loving" mom/parent... find good friends/mates, love others more by giving your time to the needy....trust me it takes the spotlight off of "YOUR" problem! (remember everyone hurts sometime!!!!
Life is wonderful, full of surprises - don't give up at the first sign of trouble!
 
Dont forget, when the odds are against you:
Raise your head high and strut down the runway of life...all eyes on the winner-YOU!!!!

Have a great day and remember to smile, someone is watching you!!! You may save or change a life!! xo Tanya

keeping your eye on the prize

Hi blog family!
Thank you ALL who have visited this site!! We are growing, which means the word is getting out, a blog foster and ex foster kids can go to ....please ask any questions, I will find an answer if i don't have one!!

alot going on...including the usual life drama...always to be continued! lol...

Fosterkidsunite, what is the point of this blog? Why do we give stipends to kids aging out of foster care?
Because this is what I was called to do!!!
 I am blogging in response to a "naysayer", (they have no idea they was negative but I am sharing so that you learn a lesson on sticking to your guns!! ( thoughts, ideas, plans....not an actual gun...lol (i don't like those things and they kill people so please know i am NOT talking about a weapon! lol... follow me...

Today I am Keeping my eye on the prize...why am I hear, what is my purpose?? TO HELP OTHER FOSTER KIDS!!! I am clear about this.
I realized I don't have to be a celebrity or have money, I have to have heart, will and take action....and I am doing the later!
Recently I went to ask someone in great authority/position to help me, they basically said my ideas were great, ( I didn't need them to tell me that..i needed their model for success on helping others..), but they said: "no one would take me serious or give money without the 501c3 yet!"

At that point I lost all of my respect for this person because I thought they were a visionary" a leader" but I realize....they are just another clone in society who feels that only "known" people or those with "Money" can make a difference.

I thought to myself, if money could solve problems vs ideas, a few good people and action, then why is Africa still starving?
why is Katrina victims still displaced,
why are people still homeless,.. because we have, "money" in place to help them???

 I hope you get my point--money is needed, is great BUT without the PERSON to volunteer or take time, money means nothing!!

I want to see change, one kid at a time!
 It may  seem slow but at least I will see the results and NOT a statistic!! I want to know how that "kid" that aged out is doing in 15 years..after he left...no what 350,000 kids on paper are "doing"!!!! follow me....
We as people need to get up get out and do something for a cause we believe in, nothing will change until WE do!! Stats mean NOTHING unless YOU SEE and know results, you can only know if you follow through adulthood, everything else....is a guess...

As you may know May is National Foster Care Awareness month--deemed by our president as a time to raise awareness, in your way, in your community about the issues of foster care!

This will be our 2nd event at the Mount Kisco Public Library May 18th 2-4 2nd floor conference room. 
Please RSVP!! (the room only holds 100!)  and last year, it was filled!!

We will be honoring people working with foster kids and a few young people aging out and going to school will be awarded a stipend to help them through the first semester!
We hope each winner will not care about the money but the fact that someone is thinking of them, following them through school and teaching them they must PAY IT FORWARD!!
We can only help each other by sharing what we know, then passing it on.
There are times when you will be tested on how much you believe in you or your ideas and faith...I say... keep your eye on the prize...aging out gracefully and with a future plan--even if its not exactly what you envisioned, its a plan!
I was told the other day after sharing that i was doing this event and will make NO money, (all food, items for event are donated) but i was still asked by a person: "why are you doing it if your not getting anything out of it"?  I was stunned but I know that MOST people are not awake and everyone wants to keep up with the Jones" - but not only was I not raised like that by my foster mother but I take on this work because SOMEBODY has too!!
And who better than I who lived through foster care? Life still is not perfect, (it never will be or I would be in "heaven" lol..) I know that 30,000 kids leaving a year and around 9,000 in care in my area....I can only help a few...but I'M OK with that!!
Don't allow negative or money hungry people into your head to make you think that your wrong for not wanting money for doing something you love!
We are still working on the 501c3 but that will not deter me from helping 4 kids a year, only health or death could stop me now.
 I know what a difference ONE person can make in the life of a foster kid who has NO FAMILY- I would NOT have made it through NYU without the help of a lovely lady, (R.I.P Mrs. Bauer)! So the point for today is to stay focused on what is right for YOU, stay true to what YOU believe, even if its not aligned with others, as long as its right, ethical, and will help you to help others...

life is short, when I leave there is only one song I could hear in my head: "If I can help somebody, as I travel along, then my living will not be in vain".. (writer unknown)... this is my favorite gospel hymn and my fav song since i came into foster care. I try not to let naysayers effect me, but i am human. Please know that I care about every foster child and I will do what i can, with what little I have to assure a few " get it" before they leave care! This is my mission with Fosterkidsunite, I hope your in!

Have a great day, smile, someone is watching you - you may make their day!! xo Tanya

May 18th celebration reminder

Hi blog family!
Reminder - May 18th 2-4 at the Mount Kisco Library Fosterkidsunite will be having our annual "Robert Cooper Memorial Scholorship award ceremony!!  Please RSVP if you plan to attend! We will also be honoring two great people from Westchester who do alot of work with group home kids!! I will also be sharing information on fostering and how to help our kids in care!!

Have a great day ...smile, someone is watching you....xo Tanya

Words from Tony Robbins on Own...

Hi blog family!
I like to give credit when do AND if someone else can say something to save or change your life........I let them speak and share what they say!
Tony Robbins is a brilliant man who gets "how to live and enjoy life".... I got this from Oprah's own, (forgive me O) lol... but good stuff must be shared!!! enjoy!!

The life coach and host of Breakthrough with Tony Robbins believes in living a passionate life, a life in which fear is a counselor, not a jailer. Here, he shows us how to "step up" during our most intimidating moments:

1. Don't Turn an Excuse into an Identity
We need be careful of how we label ourselves, for example, saying "I'm an fearful person" or "I'm a weak person" or "I'm not a strong person." Usually that label comes from your current or past behavior, but once the label becomes a part of you, it starts to control you. So what I try to get people to understand is: Hey, you're not broken. You don't need to be fixed. You don't need a label. All you need to do is say, "I have to decide how I want to be now going forward."

2. Develop a Habit 
Courage is not the absence of fear. That idea is the biggest b.s. in the world. Fear is impossible to eradicate. If you were completely fearless, you'd be dead. People who are courageous are scared to the core—they just make themselves go forward anyway; they make themselves take some kind of action. Taking action, even though you're afraid, is how you become courageous—because courage, like fear, is a habit. The more you do it, the more you do it, and this habit—of stepping up, of taking action—more than anything else, will move you in a different direction.

3. Let Your Body Lead the Way 
Taking that action for the first time can be pretty rough. When it comes time to give the speech to the committee or snowboard down the mountain, don't hesitate. Don't start to analyze it. The longer you stand there, the harder it gets, because then your mind gets involved. If your challenge is mental, use your body. If it's in the body, use your body more aggressively. At 17 years old, I was on my own, sleeping in a laundry room. I had no idea what to do. I was so depressed. Fear is physically debilitating. I had to defeat it. So I made myself run until I thought I was going to spit up blood. I got stronger in my body, which, in turn gave me mental strength. 

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Tony-Robbins-How-to-Live-Courageously#ixzz1qqF2l66z