Rebounding after death abandonment

Hi Blog Family!
I pray you are all well and with love in your hearts. June 10th made 5 years since my baby brother, (who grew up with me in foster care since he was a toddler), died at 41 of heart disease! Time moves fast and waits for no one!

I share with you how I made it through my grief of losing the only person in the world I knew, had my back, no matter what. My life has never been the same since he died. I am a witness that no matter what you lose in this life, as long as its not your mind, lol, (I actually did lose that briefly) but thankfully, as a former counselor, I knew how to bring it back!

1. I did cry, scream and let my body go through the regular emotions from grief. If you don't cry or feel a loss when you lose a sibling you grew up with, you may want to check that with a therapist, as it is NORMAL to grieve, it is normal to feel abandoned all over again, as long as you don't wallow in it and get stuck in that loss feeling like when you were in foster care after 6 months.

2.Once I let it all out of my system, (and it took 3 years to WANT to move forward) STOP playing violins, we all lose love ones, we all must go one day. What will you do to make your siblings life not be in vain? My brother's friends and I help foster kids that are aging or aged out of foster care and going to college or trade school. We provide non traditional services. We all do the work for FREE, yes, giving back is how you move forward after death of a loved one! When you sit in pity too long, you may become pitiful. Remember God loves you, has great things planned for you, IF you get off the couch and go after your dreams!

3. Be thankful to God for ALL the years he DID give you with your sibling! 41 years, I was blessed to have known my brother, my other brother Mark got adopted off around 3 years old to a doctors family who had a daughter around 5 at the time in Elmsford, NY!! I only had 3 years, but enough for him to leave an impression on me and long enough for me to know we loved each other. Siblings teach you how to deal with other people and situations when your parents are not around! Just like your parents are a vehicle to get you here, your siblings is  a vehicle to keep you strong and sharp, give you a backbone! They are there to make you strong, teach you how to cry, and move on, drive you crazy, so when you do hit a bump in life, you don't really go crazy. (lol) those who have siblings that can be a pain at times, you know what I mean! God made siblings so you don't always have to go through your parents to learn something!!!

I hope this helped in some way. This is solely my opinion and I only write to share what I know as my truth in hopes that YOU will become the dynamic person you were born to be! Enjoy your summer all my graduates. Congrats!!!
Smile, someone is watching you!!

ps. If anyone is in NY/Westchester area and wants to volunteer at FosterKidsUnite, Inc. please leave me your email!! If we don't do the work - it won't get done!!! Lets make it a goal for ALL foster and former Foster's to get the highest education you can and when you do make it, go back to the group homes and orphanages and help our brothers and sisters that want help!! xo
T