FREE-Foster-Care-book-Foster-Parent-Survival-Guide.

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The Transition That Never Happend

Hello Blog family!

I hope you are having a great summer!

( I have no idea why red is underlining, please forgive me)...

Why is it that young people leaving transitional homes are becoming homeless?

Money has been given in the form of grants, so that those who take the grants will hopefully avoid this.

I have encountered 3 homeless youth who were all in transitional housing. 

A transitional home should  be set up to take in those aged out who are working or going to school. A transitional home should be set up to take a portion of their earnings and put into an account that they cannot touch until they leave, therebye providing them with security and a savings.

I think all foster care agencys should be required to open a trust account, (money in only and only the child who once aged out or leaves, can access the money..

When I aged out the first time I had NO money.

When I finally aged out again at 21, (I had to sign myself back in at 18, I had NO family and I refused to visit a home where my abuser still stayed).

I have been homeless 3x, yes 3...and I vowed it would never happen again.

It pays to have friends,  a true friend would allow you to stay in their home

I was blessed to become a model but sadly,  I  never saved my money. I,  survived because friends took me in.and I always found work. I stayed away from drugs, bad or mean people and negative people, places and things. .  

If I had to give advice:

1. Stay focused on YOUR goals. 

2. if you have no kids, get two jobs, put one check in the bank and pay bills with other. Find what your talent is; comedy, singing, making jewelry or art....

3.You should have 3 months pay saved in case of emergency.

4. Take advantage of the free library for internet (job hunting)

5. utilize your food pantry's through the churches

6. if you have security, you can rent a room at the larger YMCA

7. If you can get into a college, do it. you get a higher education but you also get to talk with other students who may know how to help you get the resources you need.

8. know that it is temporary, every day get up get out and do something!

9 every day you awake, is a good day and one that can start over with YOU!

xo TC

Talking yourself to your divine purpose

Hi blog family!

Summer is almost gone! I like to check in every now and then with myself, yes, me, to make sure I am processing all that is going on in the world, in my life and check in on yours...

I was thinking and a little sad this week thinking my brother Robert Cooper, would have been 49 July 22nd had he not died of heart disease at 41 June 10th 2009. RIP Coop-

we gave 7 scholarships in your name this year and over 85 gift boxes this year! 3 of our youth graduated college this May; one earned Masters in Social work (clap), associates from another, and another BA and now working on her Doctorates...go girl!! Fosters do graduate!! help us help more youth www.fosterkidsunite.org

I posted a clip of my brother making a joke about his fav kid cartoon...hope you get an idea of his spirit..

I started the Robert Cooper memorial scholarship in his name, to help other aged out youth like us, who had no family, or no family that is active and reliable in their life.
I look back on all that I have been through, all we go through and I thank God for my foster mom, who taught me how to NOT dwell on my problems but rise up and help others.

I Also learned to TALK, WRITE, sing, dance,  in a journal- on a stage... or GO TO GOD, when I am feeling low.

Knowing when your sad, depressed or angry is half the cure, the other half is seeking outside help, like therapy, (yes, I know, we hated it when we HAD to do it as fosters)
but now, we are in control of our destiny.
WE decide who we see and IF we like THEM...not an agency.

I see most therapy places are suggesting, or letting you suggest getting medication like Zoloft or Prozac and IF you are in NEED of it, then so be it but MANY of you have lost your way for whatever reason; abuse, abandonment issues, neglect etc... that is ok but you MUST talk about your past so that you can move forward without wounds that ooz....into your relationships and friendships...

Talking is a way to work through any problem. There is NO problem too big for God or that WE cant work through, IF you are ALIVE, Breathing and can communicate in any form, it is NEVER to late to start over and heal from your past.
God loves you SO much and he wants only (or she) the best for you EVERYDAY! Not when you get to heaven...now...
YOU are in charge of YOUR life, go back to school, take out the loan IF you have to, ask for a scholarship if you need to but do whatever it takes (legally) to move yourself to your purpose because ALL of you were born with DIVINE purpose!
Keep checking in NEVER give up and check out!
xo

Tanya

Legally Kidnapped: U.S., child welfare systems get failing got grades...

Legally Kidnapped: U.S., child welfare systems get failing got grades...: All three branches of the federal government and every state have failed to meet minimum standards to protect abused and neglected children,...

Tanya Cooper speaking to fosters and foster parents at Playland

Aging out where do we go from here

Hi blog family!

We have been busy trying to help more of our aged out fosters! Life goes on, even when we are busy!

Many of you don't know all of my story of when I aged out!
Not only will you get a chance to read about it in my new book this summer but you will hear stories by three friends from our,  "Aged Out Panel" ; author of 'Garbage Bag Suitcase", (Mission Point Press), Shenandoah Chefalo will be available for book signing, Donna Maddox and myself. This is a FREE event to the public, (refreshments) at the Mount Kisco Public Library May 26th 5:30pm

Come learn how to overcome "plastic bag" trauma AND solutions to aging out gracefully!

When we aged out, you should be excited and eager but often that is not the case. Uncertainty and doubt does not have to plague you after foster care, take back your life and change your fate!
Smile, someone is watching you!

"Smile, someone is watching you" - Tanya

save the date May 26th and May 11th

hi blog family!

I know lots going on!!

FosterKidsUnite, Inc. would first like to say a big**
RIP to Jr., a great man who supported our foster youth! You will be missed and I am thankful for knowing you.

*RIP Garry Shanding!!

We will be having our 2nd comedy night fundraiser May 11th to raise money for scholarships for our aged out foster youth! Please come out to MTK in Mt. Kisco, NY and support 7pm - Comics lined up: #Dennis Ross #Rhonda Handsome #Johnny Figero #Kevin McGee #Jay Silverberg, ( and a couple on standby)....its comedy, you never know!

Please be kind to everyone you meet, you never know the state of mind they nor their body are in. We as a world are going through lots of trauma like Brussels. People react differently to stress and fear; homicide, suicide, addictions etc.. BE KIND, it never hurts to say a kind word OR walk away from a bad one!
Each day we wake without family is very hard BUT sending out good karma sends you the people you need in your life to get through each day...FRIENDS!! If I had a takeaway, it would be, smile and be kind to EVERYONE you meet, as you never know how good or bad they are feeling, what they are going through; cancer, suicide, sickness etc.. YOU may be the ONE person, that saves or changes their life and in return, they save or change a life!!! PAY IT FORWARD by being kind, it cost nothing! xoxo

Foster Care 101: Helping Foster Teens as they Age Out.

FosterKidsUnite advice

X Ambassadors - Unsteady Guitar Center Sessions on DIRECTV

If I had to choose a song that represented how I felt the day my mother gave us away and never came back, this would be the song, it speaks my heart. I am well with my soul now so I can enjoy the sorrow because I made it through. Many of you are just realizing mom or dad may not ever come back for us, but we can still have joy and love in our hearts once we realize, this life journey is full of lessons, hurt, love and we can make it through anything IF we accept that sometimes, our parents are only a vehicle to get us here xo

Stay positive, focused and keep love in your heart, even when it doesn't seem to be available, its there keep open to the many forms it will come in



Tanya