Rebounding after death abandonment

Hi Blog Family!
I pray you are all well and with love in your hearts. June 10th made 5 years since my baby brother, (who grew up with me in foster care since he was a toddler), died at 41 of heart disease! Time moves fast and waits for no one!

I share with you how I made it through my grief of losing the only person in the world I knew, had my back, no matter what. My life has never been the same since he died. I am a witness that no matter what you lose in this life, as long as its not your mind, lol, (I actually did lose that briefly) but thankfully, as a former counselor, I knew how to bring it back!

1. I did cry, scream and let my body go through the regular emotions from grief. If you don't cry or feel a loss when you lose a sibling you grew up with, you may want to check that with a therapist, as it is NORMAL to grieve, it is normal to feel abandoned all over again, as long as you don't wallow in it and get stuck in that loss feeling like when you were in foster care after 6 months.

2.Once I let it all out of my system, (and it took 3 years to WANT to move forward) STOP playing violins, we all lose love ones, we all must go one day. What will you do to make your siblings life not be in vain? My brother's friends and I help foster kids that are aging or aged out of foster care and going to college or trade school. We provide non traditional services. We all do the work for FREE, yes, giving back is how you move forward after death of a loved one! When you sit in pity too long, you may become pitiful. Remember God loves you, has great things planned for you, IF you get off the couch and go after your dreams!

3. Be thankful to God for ALL the years he DID give you with your sibling! 41 years, I was blessed to have known my brother, my other brother Mark got adopted off around 3 years old to a doctors family who had a daughter around 5 at the time in Elmsford, NY!! I only had 3 years, but enough for him to leave an impression on me and long enough for me to know we loved each other. Siblings teach you how to deal with other people and situations when your parents are not around! Just like your parents are a vehicle to get you here, your siblings is  a vehicle to keep you strong and sharp, give you a backbone! They are there to make you strong, teach you how to cry, and move on, drive you crazy, so when you do hit a bump in life, you don't really go crazy. (lol) those who have siblings that can be a pain at times, you know what I mean! God made siblings so you don't always have to go through your parents to learn something!!!

I hope this helped in some way. This is solely my opinion and I only write to share what I know as my truth in hopes that YOU will become the dynamic person you were born to be! Enjoy your summer all my graduates. Congrats!!!
Smile, someone is watching you!!

ps. If anyone is in NY/Westchester area and wants to volunteer at FosterKidsUnite, Inc. please leave me your email!! If we don't do the work - it won't get done!!! Lets make it a goal for ALL foster and former Foster's to get the highest education you can and when you do make it, go back to the group homes and orphanages and help our brothers and sisters that want help!! xo
T
 

Former Gang Members Build Peaceful Communities in 'License to Operate'

Former Gang Members Build Peaceful Communities in 'License to Operate'



Hi Blog Family!

for my young ones that are about that life- thought this article by Alissa Fleck would be helpful in you finding your way around gang life! You are a leader not follower. Any activity promoting violence should not be in your life. Death is sure to come to all of us one day, no need to rush it!. Hope summer is kicking off with graduations and moving up! xo T

Former Gang Members Build Peaceful Communities in 'License to Operate'

Former Gang Members Build Peaceful Communities in 'License to Operate'



Hi Blog Family!

for my young ones that are about that life- thought this article by Alissa Fleck would be helpful in you finding your way around gang life! You are a leader not follower. Any activity promoting violence should not be in your life. Death is sure to come to all of us one day, no need to rush it!. Hope summer is kicking off with graduations and moving up! xo T

your first week in a group home or foster care?

Summer is upon us as FosterKidsUnite celebrates its 4th year!

looking back on some of FosterKidsUnite, Inc. past 4 years!

May National Foster Care Awareness Month an event we do at our local Mount Kisco Library to raise awareness on foster care and adoption AND every year we choose a different theme that needs life- this year was healing from Trauma in relation to abandonment/foster care/adoption.

FosterKidsUnite, Inc. mission -  helping those aged out of foster care with non traditional services:

 self help guide book for foster kids,

 The Robert Cooper Memorial Scholarship, (for those in school and need items during a semester,

 gift boxes during testing,  (these are items a parent would have bought and sent to the school while their kid is away and college); gift cards to khols, Macy's, under garments, personal supplies, scarves, cologne, perfume, socks,lots of snacks for exam day!!).. Staples, Amazon, Starbucks, A & P food store, (thanks to St. Joseph Seniors!!) 

BIG THANK YOU TO ALL MY DECEASED BROTHERS FRIENDS WHO HELPED MAKE HELPING OUR KIDS POSSIBLE! MY BROTHER KNEW WHO WAS GOOD TO HIM AND I WISH HE WAS HERE TO SEE THE LOVE HIS FRIENDS HAVE SHARED WITH FOSTER KIDS!! HE TOLD ME BEFORE HIS DEATH THAT IF I EVER NEEDED ANYTHING I COULD CALL ON THOSE FRIENDS, AND THEY CAME THROUGH FOR THIS- MUCH THANKS!

Hey blog family!

hope all is well and you are on your way to greatness!
Summer is upon us and this should be a time for you to vacation your mind, body and soul!! Learn how to go away for two hours, a week or two weeks, as long as you know how to silence your mind from the world and work chaos and enjoy YOU and your FAMILY in your life (friends included)!

Life is so short, yesterday marked 5 years since my baby brother who grew up with me in foster care died of heart disease!  I could have never imagined the world without him, but as you and i see, LIFE keeps on moving even when we or a loved one dies!! I never thought i would make it this far but God is good as i have faith of a mustard seed! Keep loving yourself and knowing what your value is to this earth! We all have one if you don't know or not sure, keep living you will find out what YOUR passion is and how to turn it into a life saver for someone else!
Time, if your allowed it, is your best friend for finding what you love and don't love in this life! Live it with honor love and integrity ALWAYS, never compromising for money, man, woman or Satan, (the later will lead you to all the others, lol)- wait did my auto corrector just correct satan and put a capitol?? no it didn't!!! lol i don't think satan should be capitalized, hello, he is the devil!!!

 lol in all seriousness, don't give him or it a capital in your life, leave the s in satan small so you are sure not to give it NO attention this summer!!
I pray for all peace, love, happiness and finding your comfort financial place!
To all my fosters, I pray you stay safe this summer, congratulations on school being out!! Don't let anyone tell you your place in this world, enjoy your summer and go get it- whatever you want legal and good for you, go get it as Mary Mary says in their song GET YOUR BLESSING!!!! enjoy your summer!
Hopefully FosterKidsUnite, Inc will be a finished reality soon! We helped 3 more foster youth aged out this year and hoping you help 10 of your next year! xo
TC

Sade - When Am I Going To Make A Living

were hungry but we won't give up - hungry but were going to win! when things get hard, pray and stay focused on your goals - never give up! God gave you a brain, use it..xo

R.I.P Karen Soul II Soul - Keep On Movin'

let no one stop you from dreaming! stay focused, keep on moving...xo

Tanya

FosterKidsUnite, Inc official summer is upon us

Hi Blog family!

I am so excited that FosterKidsUnite, Inc. is now official! We are hoping to provide foster youth aged out and adults who were in care, and in school with non traditional services!
Congratulations to Devon, Shantha, (honorable mentions), and Mercy -recipient of The Robert Cooper Memorial Scholarship 2014!!! You are all amazing youth and I hope your rewards will help you with items needed in college!

I am so thankful we were able to provide an extra cushion to those in school and without parents- I made it through NYU because of Quaker who helped me with books!
Never take it lightly when someone or an organization wants to help relieve some of your burden from school! Be grateful someone is thinking of you there are plenty of places they could spend their money- be grateful and pay it forward!! No one HAS to help you, we do because we love that you are moving forward, even without family! We do it because we know you will come back and pay it forward!!

Learn to say thank you and always send a thank you note to any person or agency that helps you. It shows that you too took time to think of them!

I pray you are all ready for graduation and moving up! I want you to reach for the stars, the sky is the limit because GOD made you limitless!!

Congratulations to all who finished and worked hard. And for those that have to do summer school, don't be mad, put in the time and get your mind right- it will help you in the end get better work if your educated!! If this is your last year and you cannot go to college, don't be mad, find something you are good at, something the world needs and find a way to get it to us. You can start your own business IF you have an idea and can fill a need! my brother Rob and I use to say this when we were down in foster care: "We never give up!! and neither should you!!xo

Tanya