Hi blog family!
*first I would like to say R.I.P to Mrs. Mary Ellen McKee.
Since I came to my town at 7 years old, I remember the lady who always had kind words and positive things to say.
It is important to always smile when your around children, not just foster, you never know what impact your smile will have on that child.
Ms.. McKee had a great impact on me, teaching my brother and I tennis, being a mentor and a friend whom I respected like a grandmother, I salute you Ms. McKee and thank you for years of service helping all kids at St. Marks, Fox Lane and The Boys & Girls Club Of Northern Westchester!
May 21, 2015 event
Thank you to all those that made it possible for our foster youth to stay focused while seeking higher education!
The Reality of Aging Out panel was a success!
Thank you for your thoughts on our having Brandy Tulo-Lang Sacapanio, Donna Maddox and Tanya Cooper share personal experiences on the day they aged out and leaving our youth with hope and advice on how to aged out gracefully!
One of the audience members and I had a discussion on something missing when we talk of foster youth. Quite often when we hear of kids being confiscated from the home and put into foster care everyone ask where was mom? I ask, where was the dad? Why is the woman left holding the future, raising the future and if a life event happens, mother is held responsible.
I often wondered why my birth father never came to see me or claim me. I didn't think of him long, in fact it was only for a minute when I knew my other friends had a dad and at that time I didn't. I thought maybe the "stork" dropped me off and God was playing a trick on me. Surely someone would come and claim me? I never was claimed by mom or dad.
I was fortunate enough to have a dad as my mom met and married my foster father when I was around 9? (lol I would have to verify date with a foster brother). Mr. D was the only dad that claimed me as his daughter and I was ok with that as he was the best dad I could or would ever have!
I remember taking journeys on the back roads of Bedford, sneaking to get ice cream treats when I was good (which was most of the time).
While dad was not much for words he often told me how smart and beautiful I was and never allowed me to think otherwise. He never called me his "foster" daughter, just, my daughter. We had the best time visiting his sister in White Plains, she always had food waiting for us and plenty of room to run around her home!
I had a great respect for my dad but an even greater one after I had kids. I wondered how a man that had to take time to know my mom and her foster and adopted kids, found space in his heart to know and love us like his own and yet, my own dad never tried to find me or verify that I was his. Some of my birth cousins know him, so I know he knows I exist, besides my foster care records list him in writing as my dad. I was looking for A. Evans from Long Island, but then recently I had a change of heart, why look for a man who never took time to look for me.
I had a dad, who loved me, never denied me and always made me feel special. Why not be ok with what I had, I was blessed to have him. A total stranger that claimed me, loved me and died telling me that he was proud of me, what more could a foster girl ask for?
When we think of kids in foster care and how they got there don't just think of the mother being on drugs, neglect & abandonment, think of the father who also helped make that child.
When you see a mother struggling and barely making it, also think of the father, who does not pay child support.
when you see a mother give up, not because she does not love her kids, because she has no love in her life and no support, think of the father.
Perhaps she made the wrong choice, perhaps she should have never gave up but remember she did give birth
perhaps men need to step up their game, especially when mom cant be a mother after doing the hardest part - GIVING BIRTH! I love my birth mom and I understand why she could not care for us and I respect her for allowing someone else to raise us with love, respect and honor.
Special shout to all the dads, single dads who have custody of their kids and are doing all they can to raise healthy kids-clearly this is not for you.
Smile, someone is watching you xo
T
*first I would like to say R.I.P to Mrs. Mary Ellen McKee.
Since I came to my town at 7 years old, I remember the lady who always had kind words and positive things to say.
It is important to always smile when your around children, not just foster, you never know what impact your smile will have on that child.
Ms.. McKee had a great impact on me, teaching my brother and I tennis, being a mentor and a friend whom I respected like a grandmother, I salute you Ms. McKee and thank you for years of service helping all kids at St. Marks, Fox Lane and The Boys & Girls Club Of Northern Westchester!
May 21, 2015 event
Thank you to all those that made it possible for our foster youth to stay focused while seeking higher education!
The Reality of Aging Out panel was a success!
Thank you for your thoughts on our having Brandy Tulo-Lang Sacapanio, Donna Maddox and Tanya Cooper share personal experiences on the day they aged out and leaving our youth with hope and advice on how to aged out gracefully!
One of the audience members and I had a discussion on something missing when we talk of foster youth. Quite often when we hear of kids being confiscated from the home and put into foster care everyone ask where was mom? I ask, where was the dad? Why is the woman left holding the future, raising the future and if a life event happens, mother is held responsible.
I often wondered why my birth father never came to see me or claim me. I didn't think of him long, in fact it was only for a minute when I knew my other friends had a dad and at that time I didn't. I thought maybe the "stork" dropped me off and God was playing a trick on me. Surely someone would come and claim me? I never was claimed by mom or dad.
I was fortunate enough to have a dad as my mom met and married my foster father when I was around 9? (lol I would have to verify date with a foster brother). Mr. D was the only dad that claimed me as his daughter and I was ok with that as he was the best dad I could or would ever have!
I remember taking journeys on the back roads of Bedford, sneaking to get ice cream treats when I was good (which was most of the time).
While dad was not much for words he often told me how smart and beautiful I was and never allowed me to think otherwise. He never called me his "foster" daughter, just, my daughter. We had the best time visiting his sister in White Plains, she always had food waiting for us and plenty of room to run around her home!
I had a great respect for my dad but an even greater one after I had kids. I wondered how a man that had to take time to know my mom and her foster and adopted kids, found space in his heart to know and love us like his own and yet, my own dad never tried to find me or verify that I was his. Some of my birth cousins know him, so I know he knows I exist, besides my foster care records list him in writing as my dad. I was looking for A. Evans from Long Island, but then recently I had a change of heart, why look for a man who never took time to look for me.
I had a dad, who loved me, never denied me and always made me feel special. Why not be ok with what I had, I was blessed to have him. A total stranger that claimed me, loved me and died telling me that he was proud of me, what more could a foster girl ask for?
When we think of kids in foster care and how they got there don't just think of the mother being on drugs, neglect & abandonment, think of the father who also helped make that child.
When you see a mother struggling and barely making it, also think of the father, who does not pay child support.
when you see a mother give up, not because she does not love her kids, because she has no love in her life and no support, think of the father.
Perhaps she made the wrong choice, perhaps she should have never gave up but remember she did give birth
perhaps men need to step up their game, especially when mom cant be a mother after doing the hardest part - GIVING BIRTH! I love my birth mom and I understand why she could not care for us and I respect her for allowing someone else to raise us with love, respect and honor.
Special shout to all the dads, single dads who have custody of their kids and are doing all they can to raise healthy kids-clearly this is not for you.
Smile, someone is watching you xo
T
